Thursday 28 April 2011

New Agreement

Every game live on Fox?  Gotta be happy with that...

"The deal struck by the AFL with Foxtel and Channel Seven will be welcomed by pay-TV subscribers with all nine games per round to be shown live on Fox Sports.  Four games per week will be aired live on free-to-air."

Wednesday 27 April 2011

On yer bike ROYALTY, there's a FOOTY GAME to be played.

After hearing that there is some kind of conflict on friday night that is leading to relationship issues, I suggest the following Question needs to be sorted PRIOR to any future contract negotiations between potential partners...

"A game of football is going to be played which involves your partners team, and your partner only gets one chance to see them play for the year.  They are coming off the back of a lucky ump-led victory against a better team, and are playing on a beautiful balmy friday night at the SCG.  Ahhh the SCG - it does fairly twinkle in the twilight.  At the same time, an historical anomoly of a family is betrothing their eldest sprog - a future King in a land far away.  This betrothal will have zero impact on your life, as by the time he gets to take over, even the land he rules will have routed the family, but it will probably result in endless full page spreads in the Womans Weekly and New Idea.  Assuming your partners name is not David Cassell, and therefore he wouldn't show up anyway because he is a lame-ass supporter of his supposed team, do you (a) say 'no, can't do it, you will have to go alone', or do you (b) go along dutifully, enjoy a cuppla VB's, an overpriced Villi's Pie and chips, and marvel at the number of free kicks C Judd racks up in such a short period of time."

I think we know what the answer should be...

Tuesday 26 April 2011

Round 5: The Longest Day

Well how friggin long was that round? It went forever and three teams STILL didn't play! Bluddy Hell.  Thank the lordy that there were some close games.

Of course we have the Suns first win which came over the POWERhouse... Unbelievable.  Actually not unbelievable at all.  It is ENTIRELY fitting.  The Paps have had the least ticker in the comp over the last couple of years, getting a H-On twice a year for the Crows and happily coasting to crapdom for the rest of the year.  If there was one team likely to lose to the Suns - especially after playing above themselves the previous week - it was always going to be the Paps.  And it was lovely to see C Cornes on hand for it.  On yer bike. Some ask why people criticise the Paps for beating the Crows... they conveniently miss the second part of the criticism which is 'and then lose to $hit teams'. Or do you rate the Suns now?  M Primus owns the performances... get on board.

The Crows were absolutely woeful in the first quarter.  Simple.  Indeed they were almost as bad as they were agains the Paps last week - which must have been bad cos the Paps are crap.  But then they came back only to be ROBBED by the umps who have some kind of lust affair with C Judd.  If he gets within 2 metres of the ball the whistle is blown and a free kick is awarded.  He gets almost as much love from the umps as Hirdy does from the Melbourne media.  That is a lot of love.

After my call on the Tigers likely to beat the Roos, I changed my tip 5 minutes before the game and was happy for the first half... WHOOPS! I hate that. NEVER change your tip.  Unless it is to change it away from the Hawks.  Dave tipped em for the Granny.  Dave has said the Dockers are crap, and the Cats are past it.  Let these be your guidelines going forward.

Those Pies keep on keeping on.  The Bombers gave em a bit of a push this week but The Puppet couldn't get them over the line, although a 5 goal loss probably being bigger than the actual loss.  The Dockers snuck over against the Doggies in PurpleLand, and the Sinners... hmmm well a win over the Lions isn't major.

Tippers
Lotsa 6's this week but Synnneeeeeeee still leads the way 3 clear of a gaggle of tippers. I can feel it closing though... and in the Knockout this week... you can choose from any game... $90 on the line.

Round 6
7 games and dare I say, 7 pretty tough picks?  I can't believe we are playing another THURSDAY night game.  WHY? Do we need games played 7 nights a week? I AM OVER IT!  But it is a tough pick.  The Eagles n Dees face off after a bye.  Form says tight so home ground advantage takes the points.

Friday night there is some stupid wedding on.  If you are going to be watching it then i want you OUT OF MY COMP!!!  The Swans host the Blues and this should be a cracker.  I'll be there.  Juddy will get his usual 36 frees, but the Swans will win.  Meanwhile the Roos also get their first win up for the year - they are playing the Paaaaah.

The Tigers n Lions face off in Melbourne... hmmm... The Tigers should win, and the Crows betta bluddy beat the Sinners - even Pav said he'd tip em.  But then he probably tipped the Paah over the Suns - FOOL!

Finally the Bombers should easily beat the Suns - like every other team will (whoops) and the Pies will be too big n fast for the Doggies.

Tuesday 19 April 2011

The Disturbed.

This week will forever be known as the Week of Disturbing.

Yes, Port ARE a POWERHOUSE Neil aren't they?  Fortunately I knew he was just trying to work out if you are all going senile or not - I think we all passed.

But that result just shows why the Paps are $hit.  Yes, they can get it up for a Showdown, but they are just as likely to self-combust against the Suns this week.  Where is the TICKER papsboys? Eh?  Hmmm that said, seeing the Crows play that way against a team that is $hit is a disturbing thing.

Speaking of disturbing - C Dawes.  It's not often I back a Pie but that is the softest week handed down since M Bickley placed a glancing blow on D Wakelin.  Seriously - what is going on with that?  Opponent falls into your forearm and you get suspended for a week?  That is a JOKE and if he doesn't get off then we'll be seeing no one left on a footy field soon.

Another week, another draw.  I am disturbed that they don't have a golden point.  I mean, what sport ever finishes with a draw as a valid result? NONE!  I mean ok... so soccer has a draw... cricket has a draw... rugby has a draw... basketball has a draw... DAMNIT! I hate it when such a valid argument is ruined by FACTS!  Will the relevant people please SHUT UP about having extra time etc - there is nothing wrong with a draw in the regular season.  Sit down and move on.  IT IS A DRAW!

Do I have my grumpy pants on? Yes.  That's cos not only did the Crows play CRAP but I put my money on the Swans this week.  NO I do not know why. I know I should have gone the obvious bet - a draw between the Bombers n Blues - but I didn't so move on.

Oztips eh?  No, I don't know what is going on.  All I know is they are USELESS - typical bluddy IT people.  Actually I reckon what really happened is the business gave IT requirements on the back of a napkin and asked for a rough estimate, to which IT said will take 6 months to build, the business side said "but we promised someone 3 months", then they added some more functionality and promised people 2 months while withdrawing some resourcing that was previously put aside for testing.  And Bingo.  Yep, bluddy IT...

Tippers
Leading the charge this week with a perfect 6 from 7 (nothing for a draw - why didn't you tip it?) was last years runaway winner under a new nom de plume - our very own Mr Cricket Jr.  Overall however Synneeee still leads and by 3 points already.  Unbelievable - on so many counts.  Still, as the Sinners keep telling us, it is early days.

In the side comp we are up to $75 with a few still in there - one of you picked the friday game... naughty... yer OUTTA THERE!  This week you only pick sun/mon/tue games...

Round 5
Tipping is a tough gig this week - even the games that are 'should be' may not be.  And that starts with Thursday nights game (yes thursday) with Brissy hosting the Sinners.  Yes it would be an upset for the Lions to win, but the form guide is equally crap and it is a Brisbane home game.  Sinners have too much on the line and won't let it go.

Good Friday it ain't - cos there's no footy! But on saturday the Paps should get some percentage on the Suns.  If not then the Paps should be dropped to the SAFA.  Simple.  And then the Crows play the Blues.  We all know the Blues are up themselves.  And you can all feel free to tip them.  But this is the game where the Crows get back on track.  If they don't then it will be a long year...

How hard is the next one?  Kangas n Tigers?  The Tigers have played well for a whole game.  Unfortunately that game has been spread across the 3 they have played so far.  The Kangas... well... they have had a tough draw so far I guess... but how hard are the Eagles?  I'm tipping the Tigers in a minor upset.  But there won't be an upset at the G when the Pies give the Bombers a lesson. 

Finally two very tough picks - the Dockers n Doggies, and the Hawks n Cats.  Toss a coin, but hometowns may be the final decider.

Thursday 14 April 2011

F*CKING OZTIPS

I am not normally drawn to use such language but any of you who have logged in today and work in an environment that prohibits access to an external mail provider will have already said it... basically you won't be able to log in to Oztips from work (at the bank).

Of course you can still log in and tip from home, which is what a majority of the world do!  However, if for whatever reason you are unable to do this, then I will accept a late pull-out and refund your money.  Just email me ASAP.

Clearly next year I will be using footytips instead...

Tuesday 12 April 2011

Round 2: Over Re Act Ion

Poor Campbell Brown.  He hears someone behind him ask for directions to the centre square, points in the general direction and gets CASTIGATED because he was trying to help.  If it was Juddy he would have been given three Brownlow votes.

  What does Juddy have on the umps that C Brown does not?  He must have some pics hidden away somewhere.  Did anyone notice Juddy's contact on Neon Leon?  No?  That would be because Mr Sheahan & Robbo were too busy enjoying lurid favours being thrown their way by Visy to bother replaying the incident again and again and again.  C Brown should have been given a Scouts Badge for Orienteering.




And then there's poor ole Brent Maloney.  Initial reports had him out sucking back a cuppla quiet brews, and then one second too late he realises he left his colostomy bag at home, and ends up leaving a little tinkle at the bar.  Soon after it is discovered he did NOT tinkle at the bar... and so he has now been stripped of his vice captaincy.  Is that the last time he ever bothers going to the loo in a toilet?  Some clown lies and tells the media you pee'd at a bar, and you lose the vice captaincy?  What is going on?

And on to J Riewoldt.  I don't think I actually need to say anything on this because 'Sexy Fox' has said it all for me - thank you Sexy Fox of Ferntree Gully for clarifying that 'unacceptable behaviour' is 'not acceptable behaviour' and 'young people & older fans' would like to see 'better behaviour'.  She is probably quite correct cos I fall in the middle aged category and I quite like seeing that behaviour.


Anyway, while Juddy was collecting favours from umps, and Sexy Fox was trying to find the Caps Lock key, the Pies politely went about their business and won.  No, I don't rate the Blues.  The Blues rate themselves extremely highly.  I don't.  So maybe the fact that they got close to the Pies means the Pies ain't that good either?  Hmmm... we'll see.  I've always said that unless you have won back to back Premierships in the last 20 years, yer not a successful team.

The 35 of you that didn't tip the Sinners for the Grand Final would be pretty happy at the mo.  They are looking CRAP.  Goneskie.  Never one to jump on a week-to-week bandwagon, M Sheahan has announced it is ALL OVER for them while in the same breath saying the Bombers are the real deal.  If the Sinners are that bad (they are) then it isn't going to take much to smash em... so why are the Bombers any good just because they beat a team that they have beaten when they were crap last year?  Me non comprehende.  I am sure Mike will have something to back it up though...

The Sydney Goodes did ok to JUST get over the Eagles.  The Eagles are crap, so not sure what form indication that gives.  Which means my $15 bet on the Goodes to beat the Cats is not such a great bet...

Meanwhile the Mighty Mighty Crows put in a terrible effort against the Premiership Faves, the Purple Haze.  I blame the bye.  The Crows were as horiffic as the Dockers were good.  I felt like I was watching Jersey Boys with Dave.  It was killing me.  And more injuries - but I don't have Phil Davis in my team so don't blam me!  The Suns put in a slightly better performance against the Doggies, the Tigers got pumped by the Hawks, and the Melbourne Pees snuck in over the Mighty Lions courtesy of 5 goals from Jurrah.

The Tippers
Folks, we currently have the BEST TIPPER IN AUSTRALIA in our competition.  That's right.  They will one day make a mini-series about the rise and rise of Synneeeee, or as you can call him.  Number.  One.  Leading the way with a perfect 8 from 8 this week and thus getting the boner point, Synneeeee is now THREE points clear after just three rounds.  This would be a concern on its own, but I would like to also point out that in second position we have RedHotChilli - a man who over a period of 2 years has not laid a winning bet even once when betting on a two horse race.  So either these two have made a deal with the devil, or the results have been that surprising so far that only people with NO IDEA could be anywhere near the top of the table... I'll let you all decide.

In the side comp we jackpot to $60 - Saturday Only games this week...

Round 4
Three teams with a bye this week - Sinners, Doggies and Lions - so just the 7 games.  Match of the Round is definitely the Blues v Bombers.  Primarily cos we really don't know which of these teams will finish 13th and which will finish 14th - this could be the game to decide it though.  I'm picking the Blues without conviction.

The Pies will smash the Tigers, the Dockers will smash the Roos, and the Hawks will smash the Eagles, but the Showdown... well the Crows WILL win of course but these games are rarely easy.  The Suns host the Dees this week and I have a feeling... well lets just say... the Suns are a chance. 

And the Swans n Cats... a tester for both teams.  I think the Swans will just get home.  But if you want the real winners, ask Synneeeee cos he has all the answers.

Monday 11 April 2011

Update Coming Soon..

In the meantime, the Round 4 knockout will again be Saturday Only games...

Wednesday 6 April 2011

Mick Malthouse: Wordsmith

Once in a while you hear something that is so profound, so NEW... that you have to share it with the masses... Mick Malthouse is this weeks man.

"Malthouse said he spoke to Gold Coast coach Guy McKenna on Sunday and told his former assistant at Collingwood that the Suns had to "crawl before they could walk.  He understands that the darkest time of night is just before dawn,".

Pure.  Genius. 

Does someone write these for him or does he just shake the 3-sided cliche dice?

Monday 4 April 2011

** PRESS SAVE and READ the SIDE COMP **

Looking through the tips I think 2 things...
a) People aren't checking their tips and pressing save...
b) People aren't checking the side comp info.

I can't do anything about these... sorry - you need to press save, you need to check that you have selected in each game, and you need to make sure that if the Managers comments on OZTIPS (top right hand side) and the bit on the right of the blog say 'pick from games x, y & z', that you do it.  These things have been the case for 2 seasons... what can I say?  And I picked Port... ugh!

Round 2... No Crows So Who Cares?

I know that is what you are all thinking but there are some people that care.  For example J Riewoldt.  He cares a lot!  And if you look closely as he spazzes out you can see he spit out the words... 'bluddy Horseboy...' cos yes... I did replace J Brown with J Riewoldt!  But for the record, no I didn't choose L Hayes.

*** NOW... a few of you tipped a NON-SATURDAY game for the knockout comp... it was put in the blog on Monday morning AND as a Managers Message on the Oztips website... so no mercy... sorry... but it's not fair to those that picked Port!  ***

Looking through the tips, two tippers scored 7 from 8 - which is a full house in yet another week with a draw - and it says much about the round that one of those people was RedHotChili - a man who over the course of 3 years has bet 8 times for our tipping group and lost EVERY SINGLE BET.  Yep, THAT shows that there were some upsets this week.  

Despite me tipping the Suns, the Blues smashing em out of the water was not an upset.  I think Mr Hunt is being a little harshly dealt with by the media, but he has a cuppla million reasons not to give a sh1t.  Will the Suns win a game this year...? hmm.  It just shows that bigger bodies put more pressure on and once it's on, it's catching, cos there weren't too many pass marks for the Suns.  Meanwhile over in the West the Cats held sway over the Dockers.  Didn't see much of it but whenever I did switch over from the car accident on channel 518, it seemed like the Cats were two goals up.

Those Paps are good eh?  Even the tarpaulines had more of the ball than half their players.  If you can't beat a woeful west coast on yer home turf, then give it up.  Maybe the Paps should relocate...?  They could combine the Paps, Roos and Suns together, become the Poor Northern Suns and have a great end of year trip.  Although to be fair, the Suns should win some games in 2012.  Was fun listening to Harvey launching into the rest of his team as they got smashed by the Pies.  OOF!  No surprises there really though.  And ditto the Doggies over the Lions.  The Lions/Suns game is going to be special... but a question - why do both Queensland teams have the same colours?

BTW I am SICK of the LOVEFEST that Jimbo Hird is getting from the commentators.  It is just pathetic.  What is he doing to get this?  Massages with Happy Endings?  I didn't know the Bombers were playing another team with a name on sunday.  I thought Bruce and Jimbo were just gazing at eachother from across the stadium blowing kisses at eachother.  Two Words.  Tim. Watson.  Anyway the Swans gritted it out... not sure if they played overly well. 

Speaking of lovefests... the Dees.  Let us make this clear.  The Dees were ahead at one stage because the Hawks kicked absolutely crap in front of goals.  And while bad kicking IS bad footy... it didn't need the Hawks to find another gear to smash the Dees - it just needed them to kick vaguely straight.  Yes the Dees will improve this year - they should, given the draft picks over the last 5 years - but just because they manage to scrape ahead on the back of shocking kicking from the opposition, does not make them top 4.  or top 8.

The Ladder
RedHotChili and Syneeeeee managed 7 from 7 this week... I can understand RHC doing that but Syneee.... I had more respect for your tipping than that.  Either way you are now into the lead - a point clear of a bunch of people who should know better. 

Round 3
Pies will smash Carlton.  They are Rubbish.  But the Blues are worse.  Dogs n Suns... uglier than Ling's face after a dog has unloaded on it.  Crows n Dockers... home ground gives the Mighty's the advantage but the Dockers are a good team.. GO YOU CROWS!  Tigers n Hawks... c'mon Jack!  They need you and I need you for my dream team!!!  No J, No Chance.  If the Tigers get within 5 goals then they have improved this year.

Eagles in the West against the Swans... I can't tip the Weagles... nup... no way.  The Dees will be too good for the Lions and the Cats will crush the Power like little par-boiled kipler potatoes.  Which leaves the Sinners and Bombers.  The Bombers have a good record against the Sinners, but once I heard RedHotChili was tipping em I clicked the lil dot next to St Kilda.