Show us yer Tips!

Ooh yer its back on folks. Starts on the morrow so get your tips out, I mean in.
Pre-season is over (apparently it began). Was chatting to my neighbour (WildJohnny) last weekend and, in amongst the usual Cats dribble, he made mention that he'd heard from his daughter, Who'd heard from a mate, Who'd heard from a dancing trapeze artist, Who'd heard from a newsagent Who danced with a Boy, Who'd Danced with a girl, Who'd danced with the Prince of Wales, that the Lions won the pre-season.
Now it was at this point that I grunted and groaned a bit, heck I even went inside and popped a laxative, had a couple of strong coffee's, bag of prunes, but still just couldn't give a...umm...damn.
It all starts now folks and who, apart from my beloved Port Pear, will win. Well here's my usual dribble:
Blues v Tigers - G. Frankly my dear I don't give a...umm..laxative...but reckon the Tigers will belt em by plenty. Malthouse will blame his list, which he did last year and did nothing about at trade time, except get rid of Mitch the B*tch who will light up the Gabba, just like Fev did...
Dees v Suns - G. Suns...yawn.
Swans v Bombers - ANZ. Well the bombers will be all "Rara" and "whoo hoo" and "yay team" (and  "pass the gear") and will come out firing and give themselves a big chance...then get smashed by a better team who will prove that you can take all the drugs in the world, but if you're still $hit then you lose.
Lie-ons v Pies - Gabba. Well I'll be there, pure blonde in one hand, and beer in the other, I mean pie on the other. Everyone likes to see the Pies lose and hopefully this will be what I see, well up until half time. Come 3 quarter time I suspect I may not be able to see at all and be wondering what Plan B was.
Dogs v Eagles - Etihad. Where is that strong coffee and bag of prunes? Eagles I spose.
Saints v GWS - Etihad. You can get decent coin on the Saints here from Sportsbet. Worth a couple counterfeit RBA dollars from Horseboys lil project.
Crows v Poos - Portress. Reckon the Cows are a chance here, but will tip the poos out of spite.
When My Baby Smiles at Me I go to Freo v 2015 AFL Premiers - Smurf, I mean Perth, sorry had stupid Purple things on my mind. Port by plenty to break their hearts again. I'm sure Ros Lyon will tell his boys to play clean...
Hawks v Cats - G. The curse!! The curse of the Poo's and wee's will prevail over the Cats who wont even make the 8. Tell you what will be keeping a low profile over the fence after that one.

Any probs, remember you're not wearing purple, you're not the law firm who missed out on representing Hird and you heard it first here that you can make a killing on Sportsbet re Cats (outside of 8). After all that you'll feel better.
Now stop admiring my height and get tipping folks!!!
Don't Guy Forget your GF's and Spooner

Time to Tell someone to GF

Greetings good football people...and Pies fans....
Its not often you can do this, so take your chance: Tell me to GF. And while you're at it tell me your spooner. Actually Pies fans tell people "GF" every day, but that's just how they talk.
Remember 3 bonus points per correct Grand Finalist and 3 for the correct spooner. Careful cos you get some points taken off if they finish in the wrong side of the 8.
Tell you what I felt like telling some people a "GF" prediction at work yesterday, but I digress.
Now remember its easy: just email me (ONCEGREAT) via the footy tips website, or for a good time email johnharriott@hotmail.com
All you gotta do is tell me your Grand Finalists and your wooden spooner BEFORE the start of round 2. It's that easy! Here's an example:
"Hey ONCEGREAT, loving your blogs man, you rock...not only are you far more eloquent than Horseboy, more importantly, you're taller.
Now I reckon those salary cap dodging Swans will make the GF...all to no avail though cos that all conquering Port Power will also be there. Oh ONCEGREAT those guys rock almost as much as you, they are a real footy team man unlike those Chardonnay sippin whingers they share a state with.
In fact oh fantastic tall eloquent and, it must be said, damn good looking ONCEGREAT, I reckon those chardonnay sippers will get the spoon and all their brainwashed fans will leave 5 minutes in...instead of an hour in like usual.
Cheers"
Any probs, have a damn good look at yerselves. If that doesn't work try sledging a Hawks fan, you'll feel better. Still no good, email me.

Roll up roll up 2015 is about to begin

Greeting Folks,
OnceGreat here taking over (hopefully temporarily) for Horseboy.
Horseboy has taken a temporary break to pursue other interests, ie he cant be a$$ed doing this anymore.
Fear not, it will be bigger and better, much like myself over the Horse. He's 6 Foot 2 and I'm 6 Ft and 2.0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 inches.
I'm taller, we've asked everyone and 50% affirmative answers proves conclusively I'm bigger..and therefore better.

Oh and I wont be mentioning those Cro..Cr..Crrrr...nope cant do it, I wont be mentioning the embarrassment of South Australia EVERY single post. So fear not.

So lets get this party started, some deets:
Same Name:
Horseboys AFL Tipping Carnival
Same Password: lovecrows
Damn I promised I wouldn't say it!
As administrator I know I should change this, but choose not to, as I want to pursue other interests (you got it, I can't be a$$ed...not that there's anything wrong with that...Swans fans...)
Yes I know YOU don't need that password, but you're going to pass this comp onto your friends (well associates....Saints fans....I mean does ANYONE like you?...I digress).
I know Bombers fans will be good at passing things onto people via the, shall we say, underground network.
Anyway tell you friends.

Feel free to message me of you have any probs.
I'll be contacting you re money (isn't that what they say on Lygon St...Blues fans...along with "sheesh I wish we had some decent players this year", "Si I will have a Pizza Guido", and "tell Hirdy he has 3 weeks to pay up or cousin Vinny is a gonna pay him a little visit")

Yes yes I know the blog has last years stuff re Rules, What to Do, etc. And I COULD be a$$ed changing it. However my IT skills took time out to genuinely pursue other interests...and never returned...what does this button do...

Bye for now people...spread the word...and get tipping.
Cheers
ONCEGREAT

ONCE GREAT steps into the breach

The tipping comp is back and this time ONCE GREAT will be running it.  He will contact people soon....

Hmmm. Done.

That was ridiculous - sorry.  Taking into account the BPoints and margins the winner by a point was Sean Langcake, 2nd Mr Cu and 3rd (she is always in the green) Kermie the Frog. 

In the side comp.... well I won it. But I feel so guilty about my timing that I will just roll the money into the full results payout.

I think it's clear that it's unlikely I will get around to organising it again this year - if you can't do it right, don't do it :)  I'll see how I go.

Thanks for your patronage folks!  Full results... here:

	Name	Margins	Total
1	Sean Langcake	764	163
2	Dennis Cu	966	162
3	Kermitt the Frog	847	161
4	BJAK	825	157
5	Tom Rosewall	825	156
6	ONCEGREAT	780	155
7	MadJakob	871	154
8	Peter Tancred	804	154
9	Gutterguard	975	153
10	shockeroo	741	153
11	John Murray	809	152
12	Mr.Poutine	845	152
13	Andrew Casey	952	151
14	Hoookster	812	151
15	Joseph McAleer	811	151
16	The Nipsters	832	150
17	wildjohny	828	150
18	Crazieburn	831	149
19	Synneee	847	149
20	wigmapoole	761	149
21	David Polkinghorne	844	148
22	DrizaBone	916	147
23	His Goaliness	753	147
24	smokin' joe	797	147
25	James Haskard	1106	146
26	Magyver	795	145
27	ruby2shoes	864	145
28	pavsthaman	917	144
29	150 years of dominance	1020	143
30	Courageous Cale Morton	841	142
31	IH8Crows	818	142
32	Taalia Paukkunen	1122	142
33	horseboy	895	141
34	James Nugent	857	139
35	Nelson Rocks	830	139
36	pizerule	834	139
37	Kevin Andrews	855	138
38	Asylumseeker	868	137
39	DrPhanto	868	137
40	louman	895	136
41	Chooka	1103	135
42	HelenH	851	135
43	Pavpaaa	1025	134
44	Laura Berger-Thomson	843	131
45	Dolores	1036	130
46	Kelsey Wilkins	842	127
47	crowsfc	980	123
48	Mr Cricket Jr	956	123
49	PieMad	993	122
50	AntiDave	840	118
51	Judge_Dredd	990	91
52	Grant Turner	837	76
53	The Falcon	876	63
54	Owen Bailey	859	57

Not forgotten !

Hi all - Just because the piss n poos won the Granny does not mean I have forgotten the tipping comp - I am overseas at the moment but I will be back next week to sort out the bonus point from the Gf/WS and the cash :)

Cheers

Round 7 - hmmmm

Yeah it has been a while folks but it's been a busy few weeks! In the meantime the Mighty Crows have lost to some good teams, beaten some shit teams, and been beaten by the cream of the plop - the Dees.  Disturbing.  Almost as disturbing as the Jack Viney decision. Not sure what he was supposed to do there - vaporise? Bizarro.  Surely it will be overturned... Surely...

Almost as disturbing as the Crows crowd... Who boos their own team?  Who leaves with 5 minutes to go when yer two goals down? I thought that was behaviour copyrighted by Tigger supporters. Shame on you! You bring (even more) shame on you lowly town!

But it started with an obvious caning as the Pies - written off after round 1 - smashed the Blues - written off when they play good teams but apparently oh so united when they play shit teams.  Malthouse threw the team under the bus. Or maybe he is the driver of the bus.

But hang on... That's not a caning... THIS is a caning... The Hawks spat out the Sinners to the tune of 145 points. Oh my.  Where was Koshitsme?  He was too busy saying he wished he played in an earlier era on fox footy... This is the player that got knocked out a few times in an era when players were well and truly protected but he wants to play back when they really got thumped?  Tell him he's dreamin'...

The Paps sadly continued to look pretty good as they beat the Giants.  Just wait folks cos next year the Giants will be where the Suns are now... And you can quote me on that... I have to say though the Paps are playing good footy. They look quick and they are hitting targets. Shame Wingard always looks like he is going to cry.  But then again maybe he is crying for the crows.  I know I am.

While Sydney smashed the lions, the Suns apparently came of age after giving the Roos one up the clacker. Nice.  And the Dockers went top 4 beating the beagles, the Cats just got home against the Tiggers, and the Bombers just beat the doggies.... Yawn.

THE TIPPERS
Three 8 from 9s this week was a fairly handy effort by mr cricket jr, jumbo Haskard and Havy Kevvy Andrews.  That moves young James into 2nd position, one behind Sean Langcake, and one ahead of a bunch of talented folk.

In the streak comp leading the way are Dr Phanto and PieMad with 10 on the trot, but they aren't live any more - of the current streaks Mr Gay Leads the Way with 7.

ROUND  8
It starts big with buddy + tippers lining up for the swans for the first time as they take on the hawkers.  Still can't see the swans doing it though- their midfield just doesn't seem quite there yet - hawks by 4.

Can't see the crows losing this week. Actually I heard they are unbackable.  In the meantime the Paps will slot the Dockers away, while if you want an upset look for a repeat of last years effort by the Lions as they bring it home over the Bombers.

The doggies will beat the Dees - who doesn't - the beagles will beat the Giants cos it ain't 2015, and the Sinners will hand the Blues a win.

Easy.

Round 1.2 - No Bonus Point For You!

Yes... I disagree with the bonus point when no one got full points... I emailed the footy tips help line and they said the best way was to go in and remove a point from each person... So to restore the integrity I will take an executive decision and take the bonus point away from each person that got a bonus point incorrectly. If anyone has a problem with this, feel free to email and I can refund the $.

Anyway, in between the Hirdy debate there was some football played. The Cats looked damn fine as they ran over the top of the Crows and continuously through Dangerfield. The sooner the crows can find someone to help out Danger the better. If you picked the Cats for the Grand Final you will still feel happy with your selection.

The Roos looked as crap as ever. The Bombers ended up paying $2.95 and was the easiest money you will ever make. Certainly easier than the money I am trying to make at the moment...

The Lions played pretty well against the Hawks but I am not convinced they will finish too high up the ladder, the Sinners reminded us all that the Dees are still the Dees and if you picked em for bottom, feel pretty good. And the Doggies were average while the Beagles made hay while the sun shined.

Round 2
Some big games coming up in the second round with Carlton and the Tiggers starting on Thursday night. Not a fan of Thursday night games.  An early 8 point game as both teams are mid-tier. Toss a coin for this one but the Tiggers prob start faves.

The Seen and Hirds take on the Hawks in a massive Friday night game.  Hate to say it but the Bombers are a show. Actually I also hate to say the Hawks are a show. Big game. It will be close with the Hawks faves but the Bombers a fair pick.

One of the Sinners or Giants will be equal top at the end of round 2 and most of you picked one of them to finish bottom.  Despite the promise of the Giants I think the Sinners will have too much experience and be 2 from 2.  Then we have the rather large Showdown 36 - the first game at the newly upgraded Adelaide Oval.  I flew over last week and it looks pretty cool.  Another tough pick - obviously crows for me but it is a big 50/50 game.

Sydney will be too good for the Pies with Franklin kicking a bag, the cats will smash the lions, the Beagles will maul the Dees and the Roos too good for the Doggies.  Easy.

Don't Forget The Side Comp

Indeed. Don't forget the side comp.  It's the Streak Competition.  There's $180 up for grabs to the top 3 streaks by the end of the season ($90, $60, $30) so make sure you give it a go.  At the moment the highest is... 1.

Round 1.1 Thank You FootyTips!

Bastards.  I get 3 from 4, the avg from the round was 1.6, and then they say nuhhhhhh its ok…. you can all have 4.  SERIOUSLY?!!!  disgraceful behaviour.

Anyway, the tale of the tape is apparently that Carlton, Collingwood and Richmond can all kiss 2014 goodbye.   That's it.  Game. Over.  Good. Night. Nurse.  On. Your. Bike. Eddie.  Sounds reasonable to me.  It's a well known fact that not one of the 9 losing teams in Round 1 ever make the finals.  I'm just thankful the Crows have the easy game of the round against Geelong.

The obvious talking point was the Giants over the Swans.  I bet that had a few of you re-thinking your Grand Final picks!  And yes…  I said you had until the end of Round 1 so you can change your tips to have the Swans for the spoon if you like.  It's no secret but Patton = J Brown and Cameron = W Carey.  If they can keep them together for the next 5 years, and develop a small forward or 2… giddy up.  I'm not taking anything from the losers though.   The Swans will be fine…

The Pies of course got belted by the Dockers.  Surely no surprise that the Dockers won?  They were in the Granny and half of you picked em for the Grand Final again.  Tell me you all tipped them… The Pies looked very good for 16 minutes.  And then they looked like D Jolly would actually add value.  Well… almost.  OK not really.  But the Dockers looked good and you can't see them losing many at home this year.

The Suns beat the Tiggers for the 3rd time from 4 encounters so this shouldn't have been too surprising...  Two middle of the road teams that are likely to be up against each other for that 7-10 spot on the table.  Didn't see the game but Gaz got me lots of super coach points while whatsisname got injured.  Selfish bastard.  Now i have to trade him out (just like every other super coach…).

Finally the Paps beat the Blues.  Lets see… one team made the 8.  the other team got in because ESSENDON ARE A BUNCH OF DRUG CHEATING SCUMMY CHEATS.  Ooops.  Damn spell correct thingy must have kicked in.  I mean to say Essendon missed out because THEY ARE A BUNCH OF DRUG CHEATING SCUMMY CHEATS.  Damn… that predictive text it amazing.

Round 1.2

The second part of this round kicks off with a thursday night game at the home of the Cats against the Mighty Crows.  I'm not making excuses but with seven first pick players out for the Crows it will be a great victory for them.  I am sure they'll be doing it for Bails though and I look forward to celebrating a fine victory.

Bargain bet of the round must be in the Roos v Bombers games.  The Roos are somehow favorites, with the Bombers paying $2.26.  Not sure why everyone is on the Roos bandwagon but they do this every year.  It's the Bombers all the way in Fletchers 3918381903th game to take the club record number of games.  For a crappy player that's pretty good.

The Hawks should smack the Lions down in Tassie (not a euphamism), but the Sinners v Dees game will be interesting... you guys have all chosen these two teams (and GWS) as your spooners... Can Roos lift the Dees?  Are the Sinners as bad as what everyone thinks?  Tough pick.  The Roos factor is
the defining factor at the mo so I'll pick them.

Finally the battle of the West... West Coast v Western Bulldogs.  Both had bad years last year and both are expected to do better this year.  Home ground advantage gives it to the Beagles comfortably despite being Bob Murphy's 250th game.

New Year, New Season, Giddy Up!

Welcome one and all to the 2014 AFL Season - and more importantly, Horseboys 2014 AFL Tipping Comp!

First up.  No changes to the rules or $.  Thats the advantage of living in a stable economy.  You can leave yer Russian Revolution at home, just log in to www.footytips.com.au and bingo was his name-o.  If you have any probs drop me a line.  You should also sign up for the STREAK competition.  The Top 3 longest streaks at the end of the year will get some $ back.  Do I need to tell you the rules for that one...?  It's EASY money.  Just don't get greedy.

So I need...

• $30 entry (round 5)
• 2 x Grand Finalists & 1 x Wooden Spooner (end round 1)

As usual, you get 3 points per correct GF/WS, and -2 points if they finish in the opposite half.  So if you pick say... the Pies for the Granny and they finish 9th because Bucks gets caught sticking the team with needles, then you would get -2.

Tipping goes through the finals, and you get a bonus point for getting a full round correct.  The point difference will be the deciding factor in the event of any tie, and it will probably be a top ten.

For payment, send me an email (porterl@rba.gov.au) - you can zap the money or cash me up.  And if I still owe you for last year... why didn't you email me??!!! I can pay you the difference asap.

Any questions...

Back to the footy.

How fast has this season come up? A combination of the Ashes Glory with the Saffa Submission.  Clarkey's boys did the poontang thang on all comers and wasn't it glorious to see!  I still have to question the timing of Smith's retirement... was it on the back of a Hansie style Indian Summer Payoff for putting the Aussies in to bat for the first test?  Fair enough when they put yer kid in hospital as a warning shot over the bow of the ship but still... Dodgey bastards those Saffas.  We'll take it though.  As did he.

So we get into the season proper.  The celebration lap for Mr Demetriou if you will.  And we get a chance to reflect back on pre-season form.  Except that there is even less to go on this year than in previous years.  You try picking a supercoach team when yer living in Sydney!  Absolute debacle.  One thing for sure though is this year will be tighter than the last few.  The middle spread will be bigger than a retired union players arse.  So lets pencil in the ladder before we look at the first roud...

The Tops.
Yes... it's hard to go past the Dockers, Hawks n Swans to be in the top 4.  It's ALWAYS hard to leave out the Grand Finalists even though history shows that ain't always the case.  So on that basis lets leave the Hawks n Dockers in there.  While the Hawks lose Buddy, they don't have a bad cuppla backups, and the Dockers will be better this year, especially if Sandilands can stay fit - which apparently he is.  And the Swans with Big Buddy and Tippers up front look formidable.  Can they find room for them both?  F*ck yes.  While there is talk of them losing a few mid-tier players, that will only be a problem in a cuppla years time.  Right now the Premiership window is well n truly open.  Jack (x2?) is looking the goods.  Goodes is looking the retirement.  Tippers may spend some time in the ruck to help the Canadian.  Down back can they cover for Mattner?  We'll see. 

The Middles. 
The middle is big this year.  Lets see.. OBVIOUSLY the Crows, but consider the Cats, the drug cheats, the Blues, the Roos, dare I say the Tigers, the Eagles, and the Paps... the Suns will improve and threaten the 8... That's 9 teams battling for 5 spots.  Yep... it's gonna be fun around the middle.

The Not Quites.
People are talking up the Doggies on the back of some 'exciting wins' near the end of the season.  There's always a team that does that.  Who cares.  They are always shit the next year.  Back in yer kennel.  And Pies fans... it's rebuild time.  Not saying they won't win a few... they've still got penders, swan, beams etc but they've lost some players and the ruck is looking thin.

The Never Was.
Despite Melbourne's coaching and player recruiting efforts over Summer I'm still a little concerned.  Admittedly the intra-club trial with Grenville Dietrich was abandonded but I'm putting them down as a work in progress.

Add to that list St Kilda.  Dzzzzzzt.  Lions. Dzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzt.  And GWS. Dzzzzzzzt.  Don't shoot the messenger.

Round 1.1
So Round 1 is split into 2 parts.  Whinge Alert.  WTF?  Just seems... STUPID.  Lets get this show on the road already.  It's like splitting the Hobbit into 3 movies.  STUPID!

The season opener is the Pies v the Dockers.  I thought the season opener was always Carlton beating the Tigers.  No?  No.  Who would have thought the Dockers would be in the season opener?  Isn't that supposed to be some kind of... honour?  If if was over West this would be a no-brainer but it isn't so it's a 50/50.  When in doubt go the home game.  But the Pies suck so I'll go the Dockers - after all, they will be playing the Crows in the Grand Final.

Next up is the Giants hosting the Swans.  The Giants will win a few games this year.  This won't be one of them.  Swans in a canter.  The Suns then host the Tigers.  This is an 8 point game that happens to be played in round 1.  Should be a cracker of a game.  Rumour has it that Jake King is bringing up some mates to check out the night life.  The Suns will be too good and get their season off to a cracking start.

Finally the Blues n Paps play and the Blues should start favorites.  Surely.  I must be getting soft in my old age though cos I'd love to see the Paps win.

So there you have it... get your tips in folks.  Good luck...

Finally... You Can Have Your Money!

Apologies for my extreme tardiness but it has been challenging getting the time to sort this! (I even strarted this last week).

Congratulations to Pavsthaman. In the Grand Final his team may have played like a bunch of 2001 version purples, but he came home with the bikkies, taking $500 with him. In second was Joseph, and in third was Tigger fan Luke Maguire aka 'smart luke'. This year we used the margin to separate out the positions so there are no ties.

In the streak, however, there was a tie for 2nd. Interesting to see no overlap between the Streak and the Overall winners...

Overall
RANK	TIPPER	Total	Margin	Pay
1	pavsthaman	165	735	$500.00
2	Joseph McAleer	164	638	$250.00
3	Luke Maguire	163	634	$160.00
4	ONCEGREAT	161	719	$120.00
5	BJAK	159	660	$ 90.00
6	Gutterguard	159	701	$ 70.00
7	Tom Rosewall	158	579	$ 60.00
8	Andrew Casey	158	732	$ 50.00
9	The Falcon	157	688	$ 40.00
10	DrizaBone	157	711	$ 30.00
11	ruby2shoes	157	779
Streak
1	Crowsfc	27		$ 90.00
2	TheChez	23		$ 30.00
3	Magyver	23		$ 30.00
4	WEPIT	23		$ 30.00

So you want your money? Email me :)

Cheers

Top 15 With BPoints

 A very quick update to show you the table with the bonus points... top ten get some cash and these are the top 15.  Looks like the faith of the Purple has got the Pavmeister into the Money!  Will the Haze win the big one?
 

RANK	TIPPER	Margin	Tips	Bonus	Total
1	pavsthaman	699	156	9	165
2	Joseph McAleer	632	157	6	163
3	Luke Maguire	634	158	4	162
4	ONCEGREAT	668	155	6	161
5	Andrew Casey	717	154	4	158
6	BJAK	652	154	4	158
7	Gutterguard	691	154	4	158
8	Tom Rosewall	569	151	6	157
9	DrizaBone	705	150	6	156
10	The Falcon	666	150	6	156
11	ruby2shoes	776	155	1	156
12	MadJakob	594	153	1	154
13	Kermitt the Frog	605	147	6	153
14	The Nipsters	697	152	1	153
15	Synneee	696	146	6	152